PRAISE your children!

Praise your children ten times more than you correct them!

What a great reminder that I have been in need of.  We’re living in a camper this summer as we build our home and I feel like everything has been out of sorts.  I am normally very organized and enjoy being on a schedule but since we’ve been building, which started in May, all of that was thrown out the window.  It feels like nothing is organized and we are definitely not on any schedule, we really can’t be as each day is different with what needs to be done on the house. 

I work better in a clean, organized and scheduled environment.  I feel more relaxed and at ease.  But life is not always as I would like it to be and that should not dictate how I act as a wife or mother, how I raise and instruct my children.  But sadly, I have to admit, that my attitude and outlook has not remained the same throughout this summer.  I have began to slack in teaching and training my children, my temper has grown short and there have been many days that I just hope to get through the day.  This has reflected in my children, how they act and treat one another; they are seeing me and learning from me, the good and the bad.  Sadly, it’s probably been more bad than good lately. 

Prior to moving into the camper and building, our family was purposing to praise our children 10 times more than we correct them.  I believe this goes against our nature.  It’s easy to see when someone is doing something wrong and to call them out on it.  In dealing with our childrens behavior, it’s much the same, we see the things they are doing wrong, their actions that are unkind, their words that are mean and we are quick to correct them.  But it’s easy to let the gentle words and kind action go completely unnoticed.  We thrive under praise, even as adults.  As our children are learning and growing we need to constantly praise their good behavior, this will help them desire to do the right thing and become the person they should be. 

Children are born into a sinful nature and we need to teach them to put off ungodly behavior and put on godly character.  If we’re going to do this then we need to know what godly character is.  The Duggar’s have a great character quality chart with definitions, you can check out the chart here.  We as parents need to know and understand good character qualities first so we can see them and specifically praise our children when we see them doing what’s good and right.  When we see one of our children cleaning up their toys we can say, “What a great job, child’s name, you are being so diligent in cleaning up your toys.  Thank you!” or “Thank you for taking out the trash without even being asked. I’m so encouraged by your initiative. You saw what needed to be done and just did it! You encourage me to have more of a servant’s heart.”  To go beyond just simply saying ‘good job’ but speaking the character qualities so our children learn and understand what it is that they are doing takes purpose but it is vital and will make and incredible difference in your childrens lives and in your own! 

My encouragement to myself and to you is to purpose to learn the character qualities and purpose to teach them to your children and PRAISE your children when you see them carrying them out.  What a blessing this will be in your families lives as you begin to learn as well to put off the old man and put on the new man.  (Colossians 3)